He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
