Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize