Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
