I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
