My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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