needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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