Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
