I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
