Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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