You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
MIDGETS
????
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
The air taste purple.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
