they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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