I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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