everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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