Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
