i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
