We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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