Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We talked him into tasing himself.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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