READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
