i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
