As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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