i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
