i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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