Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
