OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
