Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize