Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
