yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I don't deserve a penis
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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