Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
