I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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