Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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