his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
