everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
If I die, sorry about rent.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize