he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
