my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
