Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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