Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize