I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
