11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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