At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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