From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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