Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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