Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize