Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
