dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
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