So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
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