Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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