One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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