She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
then he tried to convert me to islam
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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