Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
