I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I think I just sharted jello shots
do nipples grow back?
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